Monday, June 28, 2010

Milestones!

We had a great weekend.  Sarah's party was a lot of fun, she had a great time!  She is probably the most enthusiastic person I know with such an incredible love of life!!  She didn't mind that it was a smaller party than usual and that Seth and Emma couldn't be there too. She loved having her friends over and playing with them!  Emma still had a fever so Seth took her on an adventure of their own.  I thought it was a great party, everyone seemed to have fun.  But I missed Em and Seth terribly.  My friends that came were such a great help and I appreciated it tremendously!!  Later that day we went to the Orioles game, it was also a lot of fun.  The girls were kind of cranky at first but then they really got into it, cheering along with the crowd.  It was wicked hot, but fun anyway and as a bonus, the Orioles won! 

It was a really long day, but it was fantastic!!  We all fell asleep quickly when we got home and I was hoping we would all sleep in on Sunday morning, no such luck, but that was ok!!  Even though I was tired, I got ready to go for a run.  It was SO hot out.  But I had a great run, great songs on my Ipod and I love running around the little pond by our house.  A cardinal flew right in front of me and I smiled.  I wanted to try for 6 miles, but it was so hot, I didn't quite make it.  But I did reach a new distance, I ran 5.38 miles in 68 minutes.  It was a new milestone and I am really proud.  Although later in the day after I had showered and cooled off I wished that I had kept going, which I took as a good sign, that I felt good enough that I could have continued.  And this morning I feel good, not sore at all.  YEAH!!  I'm going to try for 6 miles again on Friday! 

This week marks a couple very significant milestones in my life - happiest and saddest in my life!  On Saturday, my beautiful baby girl turns 5!!  I can not believe it.  She has brought me more joy than I can ever express!!  She amazes me every day, with her love of learning, her amazing artistic talents, her humor, her seemingly fearlessness and her INCREDIBLE enthusiasm for all things!!  She is a wonderful, smart, beautiful little girl!!  She is a great big sister to Emma.  I look at her and wonder sometimes how she got the way she is, she sometimes seems SO different from me.  I see some of Karen in her, not sure if it's because they are both first children or not :)  She teases Emma in ways that I remember Karen teasing me :)  Regardless, I couldn't be more proud of her and I know that she will flourish in kindergarten in the fall.  She loves school!!  I love this incredible being who came into my life early one Sunday morning 5 years ago!! 

Linked forever to one of the happiest days of my life, is the saddest day of my life, the day we lost Uncle.  I can not express the sadness of him passing away the day before Sarah's 2nd birthday.  He was so much more to me than an Uncle, he was really like my big brother!!  I hope and pray that he knew that I felt that way about him.  And even after 3 years I still ache, I miss him terribly!  But after 3 years, I can say that there are many more happy memories than sad! I think of him every day, there are so many reminders of him every where I look.  I think there is something of him, in every room of my house :)  I don't want to make him out to be a saint, because he could be a giant pain in the ass, his sarcasm could be biting. But he did with a quirkiness that only he could get away with.  And now even those moments make me laugh!  Like when I said my feet hurt at 11:00 at night, after we had spent the day walking all over NYC, he told me that maybe I had worn the wrong socks.  I was so pissed at the time, but now I think it's hysterical. 

He only met Sarah once and I'm so thankful for that.  I have so many wonderful memories of that weekend!  It makes me so sad that he never met Emma, the other most wonderful being in my life!  They all would have had so much fun together.  He would have loved taking Sarah on some roller coasters!! 

So like I said earlier, on Friday the anniversary of my beloved Uncle's death, I'm going to go for a run and try for 6 miles.  When I'm running, I truly feel that he is with me and sometimes when I feel like I want to stop, I really feel a hand on my back pushing me to keep going, so I do!!  In the afternoon, our babysitter is going to come over to watch the girls so I can pack and have some quiet time. 

We leave on Saturday for a week in the Outer Banks.  I'm really looking forward to it.  I'm excited for all the 4th of July festivities and watching the  fireworks on the beach!!  I'm also excited to run with the ocean breezes in my hair. It will be a good week, I love our annual trip with our good friends!

He should be here! For so many reasons and so many people, he should still be here. I'm doing my best to keep him alive in my children's memories and I love it when they talk about him! I want them to know him in all his quirky best!!!   He really is my inspiration for training and running this 1/2 marathon in October!  And I'm so touched by all of your wonderful support in my journey!!  You all are going to help me to keep going so that on October 16th, I can run/walk it for my Uncle!!  Thank you so much!!!

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